and I think it was a defense mechanism. Through this, though, I always maintained close relationships with those straight women who had been political allies when I was straight and we were still political allies. But my political focus at that point was very separatist. I probably was obnoxious as hell. It's a very heady time. It's like you feel you've really found the answer, and if you hate men and stay away from them and see them as the root of all evil and are clear about where you're going, then you're home free.

JV: I think it's true that people who are newly espousing a militant political philosophy tend to be less tolerant and more fanatical and need to go through that.

ST: Actually as I look back, it's rather encouraging that there were those women who tolerated me through that period....

There's this phenomenon of gay women falling in love with straight women. I think that's another place we are not able to have open conversation with each other.

LS: I had that happen to me and it worked out in a really positive way. It was hard at times; we had to do some talking about it. Otherwise it would have created blocks because you wonder why this person is acting so strangely.

ST: For that reason wish lesbianism wasn't so scary to straight women, because I think that's what it is. Somehow both lesbian and straight women tend to put themselves out of power really quickly. When sexuality comes up, it's like, "Oh, I'll be undone". It's such a power-related issue and women take the less powerful role.

JV: Most people, because of the way society has taught us, are not comfortable with their own sexuality or talking about sex or things that relate to it. I think that's probably what scares straight women the most about lesbianism—not being at ease with the subject in the first place. They don't know quite how to relate to it because they look at it as a sexual issue primarily.

LS: What I want to find in my life is a place where I can be with women friends and have a heterosexual relationship too. Sometimes it feels like they have to be kept separate. I'm trying to find the balance, because you can get sucked in either direction. It's something you really have to work at. I don't want to fade in and out. I feel that's a rip-off. DV: I saw a cousin of mine recently whom I hadn't

seen in several years, to whom I've always been very close, who has become a lesbian since the last time I saw her. It was one of the first things we talked about because it was something important to her, and it wasn't a big deal in itself. I think there was a change in the way I felt about the subject. This person is as close to me as a sister. As a result, I began to feel much less separateness between me and women who are lesbians. I think that separateness was something that I was partly responsible for, and other women were partly responsible for. I don't know whether that means that any woman who is straight has to have a sister or a cousin or a very dear friend become a lesbian in order to feel differently about it. But it put it in a whole different perspective. JV: She's the same person.

WB: I was straight for 27 years-it's not like I was born a lesbian-and I remember starting to read lesbian stuff, and thinking how weird they were. I can understand why everybody's ideas are warped. There's no way you can grow up and feel receptive to the thought of lesbianism.

JV: But in order for people to change that they have to be around it.

WB: But I sure made the change easily. I don't know what happened.

DH: That's the difference, though, between the women who were straight and became lesbians as part of their politics, and the lesbians who felt they were gay since they were born and are afraid of being lesbians.

JV: Because they grew up believing that you had to hide it.

DH: And they won't show up at something that is a lesbian thing because they'll be identified as lesbians.

DH: I would define myself as a feminist before I would ever define myself as a lesbian if people asked me. If they know me or they want to, they would know I am a lesbian too.

ST: Depending on the situation, I would say that I am a lesbian because I don't want that not to be okay. At all, ever. Women who have a core sense of themselves as women communicate with each other and get support from each other regardless of what their sexual preference is.